Hijackals at home are difficult for everyone. How do you help your child not suffer when they so want validation from the Hijackal parent? How do you stop the child from becoming like the Hijackal parent? Heart-wrenching stuff! Listen for help.
Being with a #Hijackal is relentlessly difficult, for sure.
Watching how the Hijackal treats your children can be heartbreaking. Today's episode offers insights into the dynamics of having a #Hijackal parent, AND of being the other parent with one. IT'S DIFFICULT!
HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:
- What the child looks for from the difficult, #Hijackal parent
- The impossibility of consistently pleasing a Hijackal
- Validating your own feelings of concern as the other parent with a Hijackal
- Preparing yourself to help your child
- Understanding the dynamics set up in the child with a demanding, unpredictable parent
- Supporting your child in effective ways to make sense of conflicting messages about who they are
- Giving your child back the right to have their feelings, thoughts, needs, and wants
- Help to stop the crazy-making for kids
Children look to each parent as the source of their value, for validation that they deserve to take up space and draw breath on this earth. A Hijackal parent gives a child a very skewed and uncertain view: everything depends on the Hijackal's mood or needs in the moment. The child cannot possibly understand. Things go sideways.
You, as the other parent watching all this, may be feeling doubly hurt and doubly anxious, for yourself and for your children. The Hijackal wants the child to be compliant and meet their narcissistic needs. The child wants the Hijackal parent to like, accept, and approve of them. An immediately negative power dynamic is set up!
How do I protect my child?
How do I support my child?
How do I do this all without incurring further wrath from the Hijackal parent?
On top of all you have to deal with, there's all this. It's no wonder that you are exhausted from getting inappropriate exercise by walking on eggshells and tightropes. It's an almost impossible task. So, today, I'm offering you insights and strategies to support your child, take care of yourself, and intervene in positive ways.
Take a big breath, grab a glass of water, and sit back. This episode will help.