How to Spot a Hijackal
An introduction to the toxic people I call Hijackals. Get my free ebook to help you quickly recognize them, especially when they’ve been right under your nose for years.
Escaping the Hijackal Trap
Even when you know you’re with a Hijackal, getting out of a toxic relationship – or understanding how to live safely and fully within one – can seem really hard.
Be Narcissist Proof
Boost your resilience and resistance to Hijackals in your future. You deserve to live free of emotional and verbal abuse. Learn how to reclaim your power and rebuild your life.
Dive Deeper & Learn More
I have an extensive library of videos and podcast episodes that cover a wide range of toxic relationship issues.
Buy books & audio
Need to work up to doing the work? Grab one or two of my ebooks or audio “booster shots” to get you started.
Work with Dr. Shaler
When you know you’re ready to start really doing the work to build your own strength, navigate issues with your partner, or make a plan for next steps, work with me directly.
What folks have said…
I listen to your podcast and your YouTube videos. I like the guest speakers. Your voice soothes and strengthens me. My emotional mother.
I thought I may never have this freedom, I actually felt very little when he tried to pull me in. Thank You THANK You ?
I sincerely appreciate diligent and experiential experts like you. I owe you one for my going no contact with the Covert Narcissist both episodically and for good…The untold story is yet to be shared. I’m both assertive and positive.
Your podcast saved me from a world of chaos, fog, confusion, and fear. Everything finally makes sense. I have been listening and learning, connecting the dots, and am tired of sitting in the reality “that this is terrible.” I want and need tools to break extremely unhealthy and deeply rooted family dynamics in order to save my sanity, my marriage, and my family. I especially do not want this to affect my children and how they approach, build, and maintain future relationships.
Great job! I love all of your videos! I filed for divorce and your videos helped me to do it without crying! You helped me to see clearly now that I deserve so much more. Thank you for your amazing work.
Dr. Shaler, you have just described my previous life!!! I was married to a hijackal for almost 20 years and left 10 years ago. It has taken me 10 years to recover, but I did. Where were you 10 years ago??? I so hope you can help others who feel trapped and crazy as I did. Thank you!
I have tried being part of your livestreams; however, our time zones are different-the podcasts are livestreamed early in the morning. Nonetheless, I always watch the recorded videos. You have changed my life and helped me find life again. Thank you, with love from Capetown, South Africa
Raised by, and all partners have been Hijackals. The last,was the most damaging. Thanks to you, after nearly 5 years of Severe verbal and emotional abuse, I’m out! I recommend you to women I meet who are in same boat. I’ve learned so much from you, the cycle is over!! Thank You ❤️
I stumbled (by no accident) across your podcasts 2 years ago after my X had raged and then was giving me the usual silent treatment. I credit all your sound advice for my finally understanding and getting out of the most abusive relationship I’d been in. I’ve only been with Hijackals. I’m blown away how much more discerning I am of future Hijackals. I spot them immediately and don’t have the urge to help them. Your work has transformed my life. I’ll keep reading/listening and learning.… Read more
I’ve just found your podcast this week, coincidentally on the 1st anniversary of my best friend’s death, man what a wake up! My wife is a Hijackal, Did everything you say. You might as well describe my wife by name. So I just wanted to say thank you, as I write this with tears in my eyes I know the road is long but it has to happen. Thank you for opening my eyes and giving me some oxygen and removing the blur.
Do you know a Hijackal?
If you feel hoodwinked, scapegoated, always wrong, always blamed, and powerless, you are likely in the grips of a Hijackal.
Not sure what a Hijackal looks like? This free ebook can help you know what to look for.

Book an new client introductory session with Dr. Shaler.
Still not sure?
I have 100s of podcast episodes and videos to help you to successfully navigate the journey from recognizing to recovering and rebuilding after toxic relationships with Hijackals® and other narcissistic or anti-social people.
Recent Podcast Episodes
Uncover valuable insights about your relationship – with a partner, ex, parent, sibling, or adult child.