Recognizing and Healing Toxic Shame with special guest, Addiction and Family Recovery coach, Jeff Jones, brings invaluable insights and strategies to use when there is addiction within the family.
Have you ever felt shame? Been shamed? If you haven't, you've been extremely fortunate. Most people have. Shame is when someone does their best to make you feel small, unimportant, unworthy, and a waste of space and breath. Nasty behavior!
HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:
- Why timing is such a big issue in the recovery process
- Why a "recovery message" is important to create
- Understanding how not to marginalize or isolate the person in recovery
- The importance of knowing the natural recovery process
- How to be aware of warning signs of addiction
You've been guilty of something, for sure. You did put your hand in the cookie jar, right?
Guilt, in my books, is simply a verdict. NOT A FEELING! Turning it into a feeling, to my mind, is something that was "invented" to allow some people to have power over you. To keep you feeling "less than," wrong, not good enough.
Guilt? You are guilty of doing something, or you're not. You're sorry, or you're not. You fix it if you can. You regret it if you cannot. Then, DROP IT!
Shame, though, is when someone else suggests YOU are a mistake. Know this, for sure, that it had nothing to do with you. A person who shames another is a person who is very insecure, sometimes unstable, and definitely experiencing needs for power and control. S/he likely feels badly about themselves, but takes it out on you. IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT!
Toxic shame, though, is when you take up repeating the words of a toxic shamer and repeating--and unfortunately, believing--that they are true. You take up where the shamer left off, and you never ever give yourself a break! Fortunately, you can stop this.
In this episode, we offer insights and strategies for dumping guilt and stopping shame, and recovering well from it to have your best life, and relationships, possible. Listen! Don't go another minute being hard on yourself.
GUEST: Jeff Jones, Licensed Professional Counselor, Addiction Counselor, and Certified Intervention Professional
Jeff is a therapist, addiction counselor, interventionists, and family recovery coach working online with families with an addicted loved one. He's expanded the context of addiction and created a three-phase program that empowers families to safeguard their loved one in an addictive cycle or recovery, while they engage in a process to stop the addiction cycle in this generation.
After putting it online and wrapping a user-friendly online community around it, Jeff is moving towards his goal of empowering families to connect with like-minded people, family-specific resources, and expertise when they are ready.
Listen to understand why Jeff says, "I'd rather see you sit in an AA/NA meeting in resistance than not being in the room at all."
FREE GIFT from Jeff Jones: Contact Jeff at his website for his "3 Tips to Ensure Your Loved One's Recovery"
CONNECT WITH JEFF JONES