What Good Is There In Receiving Criticism From Someone You Hardly Know?

receiving criticism

Have you ever experienced receiving criticism from someone you hardly knew–and, who hardly knew you?  It’s a strange situation, isn’t it? I think so. I wonder if they think it is a way to build intimacy in a relationship that is barely past the acquaintance stage? Or, is it an attempt to demonstrate their vast awareness […]

Relationship Help: S/he Who Won’t Be Pleased!

Have you ever lived with, or worked with or for, S/he Who Won’t Be Pleased? No matter how much attention, time or effort you give something, it is not good enough. No matter how much you offer, you are discounted for not offering more, or for not offering something different. Relationship problems result. Does it […]

Relationship Help: Help! I Don’t Find My Partner Attractive Anymore.

find my partner attractive

Whoa! What do you do when you don’t find your partner attractive anymore? Maybe they gained weight, lost weight, buffed up, slouched down, shaved their head, got a tattoo, went bald, or lost the ability to see or hear. What do you do? First of all, good for you if you have figured out and […]

Relationship Advice: “So, the passive-aggressive guy said….!”


Maybe it was Art Linkletter who said, “Passive-aggressive men say the darndest things!”  The passive-aggressive guy said,  “If I can’t get what I want, then why should I give you what you want?” Now, in a supposedly loving relationship, that’s quite curious. It turns relationship into bartering. And, of course, it’s not rocket science to […]

For Relationship Help: Put an End to Blaming!

If you’re always looking for someone to blame or blaming someone else for where you find yourself in life, you will never have close or satisfying relationships. It’s that simple! In your love relationship, you may stay together but you won’t be emotionally intimate. You’ll both be settling for far less than you could have […]

High Conflict Couple

Hijackal® behavior creates high conflict couples.  They exhaust themselves and, eventually, the relationship. A High-Conflict Couple involves one or both partners who: Just want to keep the conflict going, any conflict. Blames, shames and/or judges…and then justifies his/her own behaviors by making it Read More > >

Relationship Help: Do You Have a Crazy-Making Partner or Co-Worker?


Do you have a partner, boss or co-worker who you would often–operant word, often–describe as crazy-making?  Does s/he frequently seem to give with one hand and grab it back with the other? This can be a description of the emotional and verbal behavior of a passive-aggressive person. My friend, Brenda, was telling me about her […]

Relationship Help: Can relationship problems be solved quickly?

Recently, I was working with a couple who were with me for the second counseling session. At the end, the fellow said: “How long is this going to take to know if this relationship can get better?” Big question with no answer. But, what it did highlight that I thought I’d share with you today […]

Relationship Help: It Takes a Little Willingness!

I got a call from a potential client the other day. She definitely was looking for relationship help. She has a daughter who is in her twenties with a small child. No baby daddy on the scene. The issue is that the mother says the daughter is always angry with her and she wants to […]

Ten essential insights about anger you need to consider

Anger is healthy. It lets us know there is something to pay attention to in our environment and relationships.  It’s what we do with our anger that makes all the difference to the maintenance of our own health…and to the health of all our relationships. Anger management and anger therapy are the focus of many […]