Tag Archives: communication

Relationship Help: Are You Engaged in All-or-Nothing Thinking?

From mountains to molehills, from molehills to mountains, and nowhere in between. That’s the dangerous territory of an all-or-nothing thinker who actually feels s/he is playing it safe! If you and/or your partner are all-or-nothing thinkers, this blog post will give you insights into why you need relationship help to recognize, understand and make decisions…

High Conflict Couple

Hijackal® behavior creates high conflict couples.  They exhaust themselves and, eventually, the relationship. A High-Conflict Couple involves one or both partners who: Just want to keep the conflict going, any conflict. Blames, shames and/or judges…and then justifies his/her own behaviors by making it their partner’s fault. Is always seeing the downside potential in everything. Holds on to ideas Read More > >

Relationship Help: Adult Kids Not Talking to You?

I was on Facebook this morning reading the Mother’s Day messages.  Several spoke of their sense of pain and loss that their adult children were no longer communicating with them. It was particular pain of the phone not ringing and the post box empty on Mother’s Day.  understand that. It made me think of a…

Relationship Problems: Communicate. Don’t Dance for Two!

So often, when a couple comes to see me, one of them is “dancing for two.”  You may recognize the pattern: one person knows what the other person thinks, what the other person wants, why the other person does what s/he does and what needs to happen to solve the relationship problems.  And, that is…

tips for communicating with a contrarian

Tips For Communicating With A Contrarian

If you have a contrarian–a person who always says black when you say white and has no interest in moving towards gray–that you have to work with, or happens to be a family member, these tips can help you. Contrarians seem to take great joy in the “gotcha.” Get insights into improving the relationship here.

How bringing your family to work can really drag you down.

In my seminars on Wrestling Rhinos: Conquering Conflict in the Wilds of Work…and Everywhere Else! I ask the audience how many folks came from a home where no one spoke up when they were upset or hurting, the “Do not say boo to a goose” families.  Those are the homes of the “Silent Ones.” Then,…

Why are we so afraid of conflict?

Conflict = Fear to many people. If you don’t feel confident in yourself, your boundaries and your skills, you are likely to avoid conflict. It has an uncanny way of spilling out at the worst times, though. Better to understand why the fear is there with the insights in this post.

Keeping Your Inner Peace

“If it is peace you want, seek to change yourself, not other people. It is easier to protect yourself with slippers than to carpet the whole earth.” ~ Anthony de Mello There is such wisdom there for me. That is why it is the key quotation on my website at Sow Peace™ : it is…