Feeling Stuck & Second-Guessing Yourself?

3 Good Questions I’m Often Asked That Show The Trauma Bonds

Causing you to start second-guessing yourself is an unwritten directive of an emotionally abusive, narcissistic person.

When that happens, they know they have staked their claim in your psyche and that you will have a harder time maintaining your boundaries and sense of self.

Yes, you are wise to be self-reflective, asking yourself “What is my part in the relationship difficulties?” #Hijackals and other toxic people want you to taking responsibility for the whole relationship. They are happy to tell you that everything is your fault. You know that.


  • Why being self-reflective is a good first strategy
  • Why it’s important to get things in perspective for yourself
  • Don’t make excuses for a Hijackal and keep yourself stuck
  • The three questions that keep you stuck…or, make you consider going back
  • How, once you’ve thoroughly explored these three questions, you’ll never have to answer them again

In this episode, I address the three BIG questions I am asked so frequently when someone gets to the point of considering leaving, or has recently left a toxic relationship. Have you asked these questions and started second-guessing yourself?

Sure, ask those three questions and answer them honestly…ONCE.

Then, take action.

#Hijackals and those with narcissistic tendencies and traits know they can baffle you with sweet talk, double talk, or straight out lies. They know. Don’t believe them! Yes, it’s easier said than done, I know. But, don’t believe them. They are behaving from self-interest alone.

Then, don’t start feeding yourself the doubts the Hijackal planted within you. That’s their thing: keep you in chaos and confusion, always giving them the benefit of the doubt. It is not healthy, and don’t buy it.

Hopefully, after you listen to this episode, you’ll be done with those three big questions, and ready to move forward with a clearer picture of where you’re going, what you want, and what you don’t. Listen in.

You want to be a good person, a fair person, in your relationship. Usually, if you’re with a Hijackal, you’ll be doing most of the giving, and the Hijackal will happily take, take, take. That’s best clearly seen and stopped. Then, be ready to remind yourself of the answers so you don’t have to think it through again. I wish you well.

I’m always here to help.


Want to know more about trauma-bonding? READ HERE

Looking for more tips and insights on how to untangle yourself from a narcissistic person? READ HERE.

What folks have said…
Thank you for understanding me when no one else can, thank you for being here for me when no one else can. You are beacon of light in the darkness of my situation This is so true what you are talking about LoL . Thank you, I have never heard about this [diagnosis] earlier in life. Thank you, God Bless You
Youtube Subscriber

stay updated

Get every episode of Save Your Sanity by email, when it’s published.

Join like-minded folks who know what you're going through.

No matter where you are on the journey – from recognizing to recovering from a toxic relationship – we have a safe place for you to learn, ask and share.

Live Zoom group calls, online discussions, ebooks, videos and more.

Log In is required for submitting new question.