...How They Affect Your Self-Esteem & Adult Relationships
You had no choice in the role a narcissistic parent created for you and assigned to you.
You were stuck with it--while usually being quite unaware of it. It's just the way your family is, like it or not, right?
NOW, in this episode, see your assigned role(s) so you can shed them and choose again!
HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:
- How pseudomutuality creates a false front, masking the assigned roles a narcissistic parent gave you
- 8 different roles you may have observed or experienced within your family
- Why narcissistic, Hijackal parents assign these roles
- How the "ruler of the household" assigns the labels
- Why everyone in the household goes along with them
- How your assigned roles may still be affecting your self-esteem and adult relationships
In episode #201 on pseudomutuality, I talked about how #Hijackals like to paint a public picture of perfection on their families, which creating a private place of pain at home, within the family. Hijackals don't like the assigned roles I talk about in this episode to show, in any way. It becomes a big family secret to them. In fact, they will deny that these roles exist:
"I love all of my wonderful children equally."
Now, we know that's not true. In fact, sometimes, it's a question of if they love any of them...or, anyone except themselves. (That's a topic for another time, though.)
In the episode, I mentioned these two definitions from Webster's dictionary. I'm including them here because some people think that scapegoats and black sheep are the same. There is an important distinction:
BLACK SHEEP: "a person who causes shame or embarrassment because of deviation from the accepted standards of their group."
SCAPEGOAT" "a person made to bear the blame for others or to suffer in their place."
Quite a difference when you're bearing the brunt of the role, particularly!
If you recognize some issues your family of origin created, I'm here to help.