You so want to be seen, heard, known, acknowledged, appreciated, and accepted. We all do. #Hijackals know this and do their best to NOT give that to you. Control tactic! Recognize these unhappy truth about a narcissistic or anti-social person.
HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:
- Why Hijackals cannot be emotionally intimate
- The difference between being proximate and being intimate
- Why you're desire for intimacy is their opportunity to weaponize your vulnerabilites
- Don't mistake the desire for control with the desire to know you better
- Important understanding of the psychological definitions of intimacy
- Why emotional intimacy requires the emotional safety you'll never have around a #narcissist, a @Hijackal
Being known, seen, heard, acknowledged, approved of and accepted...Those are the very things that a person with narcissistic or anti-social tendencies will not give you. That's how they manipulate you.
You want those things and they pretend, suggest, or promise them. You know now that you're not going to receive them.
I hate to have to be so strong, but it's essential: STOP HOPING!
That person who manipulated and love-bombed you into falling in love with them is a mirage, a charade, a facade, a chameleon. That person is made-up and put on. That's not the real person.
If you keep hoping that that mythical first-date person is real, you'll keep thinking that if only you could find the right formula while making yourself into a pretzel--that person would return. You know that you only see that person now when the Hijackal is really afraid of losing you, or really wanting something you don't want to give them, right?
Sad, but true!
That's why today's episode is SO IMPORTANT! Good people hold out hope that difficult, toxic people will change. It seldom happens....and, I mean REALLY SELDOM! They will make some surface changes for awhile, but their basic nature most often wins out and they go back to their damaging ways.
Yep! That's the bottom line: stop hoping, OK?
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