Knowing a Hijackal
Recognizing chronically difficult people requires admitting that they not only like to win, they have to win. Yes, to win…and in all circumstances and at all times. Yes, they will give you the illusion of agreeing with you…but, only when it suits their purposes, or their longer “game.”
Know one? I’m thinking you must because you’ve found yourself here on this page with me. You’re ready to escape the Hijackal Trap.
It might be your partner, ex, parent, co-worker, or someone in any organization–family, workplace, government, court, church, community project, board, or association.
GOOD NEWS: Once you recognize the Hijackal behavior, you can immediately take steps to change it, and I can help you uncover these patterns, discover the causes, and recover from the emotional abuse they cause when they stay under your radar.
If you have determined quickly that you are likely in relationship with a Hijackal, and would like to talk, go to beaclient.com and schedule an appointment.
When you’re first waking up to the fact that “It’s not me!” it is a revelation. All this time you thought there was something terribly wrong with you.
- “I’m not patient enough.”
- “I’m not kind enough.”
- “I’m not compassionate enough.”
- “I cannot seem to get the story straight or follow the plot.”
- “It always seems to be my fault that s/he is unhappy, unhealthy, unsatisfied.”
- “I should be more accepting, understanding, patient, thoughtful, considerate…..”
Right? You blamed yourself for what was going continuously sideways in the relationship. Recognizing chronically difficult people is not always easy. One thing is for sure with a Hijackal: the problem–and the battle–is within them, not with you.
Their game is to keep you thinking everything is your fault! IT IS NOT! Sure, after you’ve been with a Hijackal for a while, you begin to build resentment, anger, and a sense of always being wrong. Sometimes, then, you react in ways you may not be proud of. That’s on you, of course, But, you are later blamed for those reactions…eternally. You are continuously made wrong for those things by the Hijackal, endlessly reminded of slips you have made, and are doomed to more of the same until you agree with their low opinion of you.