How You Are Manipulated By a Narcissist’s Voice

Whether you have a Hijackal parent, partner, sibling, or other of the narcissistic variety, knowing how they manipulate you with their voices is important to recognize. AND, they only do some of that manipulating consciously. Once you’re aware of these important cues, you can refuse to be affected. GREAT!

This episode will help you see how you’re being subconsciously affected by the tone, pace, volume, and other cues that a Hijackal gives through their voice.


  • How your body reads the Hijackal
  • Why your mind argues with your body
  • Why you need to know you can trust your body’s wisdom
  • How Hijackals manipulate you with their voice
  • Know what you’re actually taking in…and
  • Know to trust your body

A narcissist will use their voice to manipulate people in any given situation – from getting their coffee faster to controlling their partner or child.

Their goal is to empower themselves and overpower the other person, so they will use verbal tactics such as patronizing statements, arrogant attitudes, and controlling tones. They want the recipient of their words to feel inferior or afraid – something that may not always be easily detected.

However, this can have serious implications on the mental state of those who are on the receiving end of these manipulative measures. For example, someone who is constantly subjected to this type of manipulation will often develop feelings of worthlessness or powerlessness as a result.

It’s important that we’re aware of signs of verbal manipulation and take steps to protect ourselves from it. With patience and care, we can teach ourselves how to recognize these tactics and create an environment that is safe from a narcissist’s control.

Dealing with a controlling narcissist can be extremely difficult and draining… as you’re probably identifying since you’re hear, reading this. <3

There are things that you can do to protect yourself, though. First, it is important to set boundaries and be assertive about them. Let them know exactly what types of behavior are unacceptable for you. Here’s another episode of the podcast with more about that:

Expectations, Agreements & Boundaries

Responding with defensive or hostile tactics only feeds the narcissist’s need for control – it doesn’t solve the underlying problem or make them go away. Try to preserve your boundaries by addressing the real issues in a calmer and more assertive manner.

This may mean setting clear expectations upfront, expressing your feelings openly (in an adult way), naming behaviors that are not healthy or appropriate, being aware of how you’re perceived, and using powerful language that limits their impact on you. No one likes being manipulated, so don’t let a narcissist get the best of you!

And just because a Hijackal doesn’t agree with or acknowledge your boundaries, does not mean you can’t set them. If they tread over the line, walk away. Disengage and stay strong with that line.

You can also find ways to take care of yourself, such as self-care activities, exercising, and spending time with supportive people in your life. In addition, stay away from oversharing information or making promises that you may not be able to keep just to avoid an argument; this may just backfire if they use the information against you later.

Above all, remember that your feelings are valid and don’t allow the narcissist to blame you for the difficulties between the two of you. With these tips, hopefully, you can prevent some of the distress associated with being in a relationship (or any type of interaction) with a controlling narcissist.

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