9 Ways to Tell If Your Relationship Is A Healthy Slow Cooker Or A Hijackal Pressure Cooker

You may be used to making excuses for the pressure in a relationship. All relationships occasionally experience pressure. Ones with #Hijackals–difficult, toxic people–are volatile, high-pressure, and way too much steam. Save yourself distress . Listen.

Who wants to live in a pressure cooker?

No one goes out and says, “I want to live with anxiety, hyper-vigilance, stress, and uncertainty. Give me that relationship!”

Well, no one who cares about themselves does, right?

Today, I’m using the contrasts between a slow cooker and a pressure cooker to highlight just what I mean. Most of us have one or the other–maybe, both–in our kitchens. We know what they do.


  • Healthy relationships get better with time
  • Hijackal relationships have too much pressure
  • How to tell the difference between healthy relationships and unhealthy relationship
  • Nine ways to recognize there is too much pressure, too much anxiety
  • How Hijackals trick you into thinking all is well and you are loved
  • How to tell if you’re in a narcissistic relationship, a controlling relationship, a potentially traumatic relationship

Have you ever thought about slow cookers and pressure cookers in terms of how relationships start, grow, cook, or burn? It makes it quite clear!

Healthy relationships grow. They’re gently creating depth of flavor, slowly.

#Hijackal relationships degrade and love to reduce even the strongest fiber to nothing.

Which relationship sounds better to you? Less heat over more time to savor the flavor? Or, greater heat over less time to break things down?

Are you genuinely captivated by your partner, or feeling controlled and a captive? Big difference!

Think deeply about these points today, even though you may think they are presented in a more lighthearted way. These are important distinctions that can lead to you being more able to discern whether your relationship has hope for being healthy. You need to know that!

Want to dig deeper into this? Try my eCourse, and work through assessing your own relationship – with your partner, parent, ex or adult child – who presents as a #hijackal in your life.

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