Relief! Yes, you think you’ll feel it when you leave an emotionally abusive relationship, and you will…in some ways. Then, in too many ways, the Hijackal is likely to do everything possible to exert continued control over you…and, over your children. Are these things happening to you?
In this episode, we explore the nasty ways in which narcissists perpetuate abuse even after a relationship has ended. We’ll examine what motivates them to do this, and how you can protect yourself (and your kids). This is important information for anyone who’s experienced post-separation abuse, or who knows someone who has.
(NOTE: This episode ends abruptly due to technical issues.)
HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:
- How domestic violence and domestic abuse can continue after separation
- What post-separation abuse is
- 6 ways to prepare for after leaving a Hijackal ( or anyone who is narcissistic, borderline, histrionic, psychopathic, or sociopathic)
- How ACEs–Adverse Childhood Experiences–often follow separating from a Hijackal
- Preparing to be safe after leaving an abuser
Separation does not necessarily mean the end of emotional – or worse – abuse. Unfortunately, narcissists can still find a way to exert control over the lives and well-being of their past partners even after ending a relationship.
It is important to recognize these tactics for what they are: attempts at controlling the victim’s emotional progress as well as attempting to maintain dominance even when it comes to life decisions that are post-separation. Getting help from an experienced professional understands these types of people is really helpful.
Post-separation emotional abuse can begin as soon as a couple has announced their separation. It involves the perpetrator continually harassing, manipulating, or intimidating their former partner, even when there’s been a no-contact agreement or request.
It can manifest in various ways such as constant criticism and control of the interactions between the two individuals, confiscating personal possessions, or making it difficult for one partner to move on emotionally by attempting to interfere with job searches and other social interactions. Abuses like emotional manipulation, gaslighting, and psychological control can remain long after physical separation has occurred.
True narcissists will often use children as pawns to further manipulate ex-partners and make them feel powerless in these crucial moments of transition.
This type of abuse does not necessarily involve physical violence; however its long term effects can be just as damaging. Knowing your rights and being well informed about available local support services can make all the difference when it comes to taking the first step toward getting out safely and rebuilding in a healthier environment.
Watch the livestream recording for extra Q&A conversation at the end. There’s always more to learn about!
Support the podcast.