The Fawning Response creates a constant imbalance in a relationship.
Hijackals love that! You’re helping them control you, and you sure don’t want to do that for a moment longer, right?
Fawning happens when you attempt to avoid conflict and trauma by appeasing people and demonstrating or feigning interest to earn the approval of others. Sadly, it also causes you to deny your rights, interests, thoughts, feelings and to abandon what’s healthy in adult relationships: equality, reciprocity, and mutuality. You may avoid conflict in the moment but you’re also giving up too much.
HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:
- Recognizing the fawning response
- 12 Ways fawning makes a Hijackal happy
- Why narcissistic people want you to fawn…and then, make you wrong for it
- 8 steps to take to stop the fawning response and reclaim your power
Ready to take back your power and give up fawning? I’m here to help.
Let’s talk soon.
MACHINE TRANSCRIPT
Tonight we’re going to be talking about something that’s related to what the last episode was about. We’re going to be talking about 12 ways finding keeps you stuck in emotional abuse. And fawning is related to last week’s episode on people pleasing. So I wanted to bring them together in close proximity so that you could see the similarities and where you might need help to look to see what you may be doing that you could change so that you could take back some power in your relationship. And if you find that you’re more concerned about what other people need than what you need, you may be abandoning yourself.
And in that fawning response is a way to abandon yourself.
And if you want love and support and approval, and a sense of belonging, you may also abandon yourself to try to fit in with someone else to repress your own needs and wants in order to feel like you can fit in with someone else’s. And you may have a fawning response, because you have learned to kind of shut down and freeze. You know, we have various responses to stress. We all know about fight and flight, we may not know about freezing and fawning. And these are when we have this response to the stress in the moment. And it causes us to create certain patterns. And one of those is what we call the fawning response.
So if you have been with me before, you’ll know that you can find me easily at for relationship help calm. And also to know that you are welcome at any time to support the podcast, either by a one time donation, or a regular monthly donation, your choice what size that is, you can do that at patreon.com/save, your sanity patreon.com/save your sanity. And I really appreciate appreciate the support. There’s a lot that goes into keeping this podcast going and it is really helpful and affirming when we receive those donations.
So let’s just talk about the ways that you can get stuck in the fawning response.
I’m really going to talk about 12 ways tonight, then I’m going to talk about eight things that you can do to get out of it to not do it anymore.
So it’s one thing to recognize and realize the other is to take action and remedy. I want to help you with that as well. So finding as I said often goes hand in hand with people pleasing, because you you just have a deeper issue if you get into the fawning people pleasing means I put your needs ahead of mine, I want to make you happy. And I think that that will do something for me if I do that. But when we get into the fawning response, we are actually going deeper, I will submerge my needs, I will repress my needs in favor of yours. I will give you all of the air in the room, and I will stop breathing.
It can be that dire. It can be the way that some people approach it. So a good thing to know is that finding is often a trauma response. You have learned to do that maybe earlier in life. Maybe not just in this relationship that’s on the top of your mind right now. Maybe you learn to do it when you were a child. Maybe you had Hijackal parents, maybe a Hijackal parent, or you have been in situations where you have received other kinds of trauma.
Now I use the word Hijackal because I created that word to give us a way to talk about people with undiagnosed conditions, but with tendencies and traits towards things like narcissism or sociopathy or borderline and so we can’t diagnose them. They’re not My client, I can’t diagnose them, you’re not wise to diagnose them. And they’re unlikely to be diagnosed because we all know Hijackal think they’re perfect the way they are. So why would they go and ask for a diagnosis or ask for help.
So it becomes important to recognize that you may have these things going on. And you may be endeavoring to put yourself a deep second to avoid conflict with somebody who enjoys repressing you, which would be a Hijackal. So that term that I created Hijackal is defined this way. Hijackals are people who hijack relationships for their own interests and purposes, and then relentlessly scavenge them for power, status and control. Does that sound like something that you’re engaged with?
Well, if you’ve been listening to the podcast for a while, you’re probably nodding yes. But if you’re new, it’s important to realize that if you’re with someone who wants power, status and control over you, you’ll probably want to listen to a whole lot of episodes. So you really understand the dynamics of this and it can be it can keep you stuck in a toxic relationship. You may feel codependent, you may be codependent. And you may even be emotionally withdrawn, even silenced. Because you have just succumbed, you have just laid down and you’ve become a bit of a doormat. Nobody feels good in that way. But it may be the only thing that you know what to do with.
And so it’s important to recognize that the fawning response is an attempt to avoid conflict or further trauma. So we don’t want further traumas. So that’s okay. We’ve found something that helps us feel like I’m a little safer in the world. And it puts it takes the spotlight off you and puts it on to appeasing other people, and demonstrating or feigning it may not be accurate, but you may be feeling interest in the other person in order to keep the peace, then you may be wondering, well, do I have this fawning response? So I found this wonderful list on healthline.com. And the list was called Am I finding right now? Some questions to ask yourself during a conflict? So I printed them out and I’ll read them to you.
Number one, does the stance I’m taking a my reaction to this person feel aligned with my values? Perhaps properly? Am I deeply respect in the humanity of the person in front of me while being seen and held in my humanity? Am I speaking from the heart? Probably not. Am I being authentic? Or am I giving apologies that I don’t mean or appeasing somebody else? For the sake of it? Probably? Am I taking responsibility for how I’m showing up while not burdening myself with what isn’t mine to hold? Probably? Am I looking to quickly to exit this conversation to avoid discomfort or move to common ground that supports us both? Even if I have to endure some discomfort on the way? Well, let’s hope so. But this becomes a very good way and we’re going to talk about these things further. For you to calibrate. Do I have this fawning response? Do I just follow my knees and try to please somebody? Now I know I’m making it sound very dramatic. But you know, you can get into a habit of, okay, whatever, whatever you want. Let’s do it your way. That’s okay. I don’t matter. Let’s do what you need to do. I understand you’re going through a difficult time i By the way, I’m almost at gestore. But you are going through a difficult time. So we’ll take care of your needs. We get to that place. Sometimes we’ve given up. Or we’ve learned that that’s the only way to have anybody in our life. Or at least we think that’s true. It isn’t true. But we may very well believe it’s true, even though it isn’t true. Because life to date has demonstrated to us. That’s our experience that if I express my needs, if I express my wants, if I express my opinions, if I express my disapproval this person runs far away from me, blames me and maybe even abuses me. So your needs get smaller and smaller and smaller and really taken down to the lowest possible priority. And other people’s needs come always first set sounding familiar to you at all. Well, I’m going to give you 12 ways that you may be finding that will in fact, keep you stuck. And you will have more likelihood of being emotionally abused. So the first one is Hijackals love that you engage in the fighting response. That’s, that’s the 12 things I’m going to give you. Why do they love that you engage in a fawning response? Well, one, you’re less likely to ever stand up to them. So they will always dominate, they will always rule the roost, they will always be on top of the pile, they will always get what they want. And they don’t care whether you ever do. Ha. Does that sound like a relationship you don’t want to be part of when I put it that way? I sure hope so. Because if you’re in a situation where you are unlikely to speak up at any time and stand up for yourself, or stand up to them, they’re loving it, and you are not. And you’re diminishing yourself all the time, little by little is kind of death by 1000, paper cuts, you know, a little more, a little more, then you really start feeling like you don’t matter. So that’s the number one way that will keep you stuck in the finding response. And why Hijackals love that. And they love all 12 of these ways. So that’s number one.
Number two is, you’re not likely to call out their abuse. You probably tried it at some point didn’t go well may have tried it a couple more times, when even less well. And so now you have learned that, oh no, you may have even taken it on board and think at some level, you deserve it. You don’t No one deserves to be abused. However, you may have gotten stuck on no longer calling out the abuse, not even speaking up about it, let alone calling it abuse, or saying that’s not okay with you. You may not even even acknowledge it anymore. And whether you think you deserve it or not, you have learned to be silent about it. Number three way that Hijackals love you because of the finding response, is your highly unlikely to say no to them.
You know how poorly Hijackals Take to being turned down? They simply cannot stand the blow to their egos. How dare you turn me down? Well, if you have been worn down and torn down and probably put down quite a bit, you no longer stand up to them and say no. You want to go here. Okay. Do you care whether we have Thai or Korean food? No. Okay. You know, you no longer have a voice because you don’t say no to them. And they are escalated and escalated and push it and push it to see how much they can get away with Have you noticed that it gets worse, doesn’t get better. The fawning response is not doing you any good. Except maybe saving you occasionally if if the person’s violent is saving you from some physical violence. But it’s not doing any good in the relationship. Because you’ve probably experienced this, the more you don’t speak up, the more you don’t have a voice which they don’t want you to have. And then you don’t even say no to them. And then somehow way out of left field comes this accusation that you’re weak and you don’t have an opinion and you’re worthless. And yet here you’ve been trying to please them by staying out of their way and not saying no to them. And then wham from the other side comes, Well, you’re not worthy, or welcome or wanted, as I talked about in a previous episode, who would want you you don’t even speak up, you don’t have any ideas you don’t care. Total catch 22 There’s no way that you can be right with a Hijackal. And you know that. So that third way that they love is that you won’t say no to them. And then, like I said, they’ll make you wrong a little later for not having any strong backbone, you can’t win. Alright, another way that Hijackals love the fact that you are finding is that you won’t stand up for yourself. Not only do you not stand up to them, you won’t stand up for yourself. You won’t speak up and say I I would like this or it would make me happy if this happened, or do you think it would be possible? You don’t even go that far to create any equality in the relationship you’ve given up and in most cases It keeps the peace a little better. So a little moment of peace. And so you just don’t stand up for yourself. In fact, you may have been doing this for so long that you don’t even know what you want anymore. You don’t know what may make you happy, you don’t know what would make you feel valuable. So you have become emotionally withdrawn.
You spend so long since you have felt comfortable voicing an opinion or a thought or a need or a want, that you just don’t even recognize them within yourself anymore. And that is really sad. That is really sad. We have to regain ourselves. And that’s what I’ll talk about after I give you these 12 ways. So you don’t stand up for yourself anymore.
And number five, is that you don’t express or maintain boundaries. And they love that Hijackals love the fact that they can run roughshod over you and they like to, again, they’ll tell you that you’re weak because you don’t have any boundaries, but put a boundary in plays. And then they’re, they’re not very happy at all. But if you’ve gotten used to the fawning response, just trying to please them, and you’ve given over all your power to pleasing them, then they’re going to love that, that you don’t have boundaries, or you don’t enforce the boundaries are your boundaries are porous, people can just spill right over them, and it doesn’t matter. And if you put up a boundary for Hijackals, often, which is why I have my clients just do tiny, tiny boundaries. And if at any time you want my help, you can go to be a client.com b client.com. Because we need to learn to set tiny boundaries. So it doesn’t feel like a huge ultimatum, it doesn’t feel like some strident, it’s got to be this way, we have to learn to set tiny boundaries. And then like a wedge getting larger and larger over time, there are ways to turn these behaviors around. And if you hear in this podcast, that there are some things that are actually happening within you and within the relationship by you that you no longer want to be happening. You can make those changes, and I’m here to help you just go to be a client calm. So we’ve got five.
Now number six is they love you. Because you’re not going to ask for what you need and what you are not going to speak up and ask for what you need and what you’re not going to identify what you need and what. Now that’s a shame that has come to that. But you probably learned that they don’t care what you need or want anyway. And they’ll make fun of you or put you down or it’ll cause an argument. So you don’t do it anymore. And again, everything then starts to get blurry within yourself. Because Am I allowed to have need someone? Do I even know what they are? Can I express them? How do I do this. And you may have become so downtrodden by this, that you don’t even have any clarity around it within yourself. So they really like it that you don’t speak up and ask for what you need and what. Because then they can be pretty sure you’re not going to give them any ultimatums and you’re not going to be a problem to them, you are going to allow the relationship to be all about them calm. And that’s what Hijackals Like, they want to be the biggest person in every room. They already think they’re the smartest person in every room. And they want to take over and take up all the space. And as I said earlier, take all the air out of the room so you don’t have anything to breathe. So they’re happy when you don’t speak up. They’re even happier if you can’t articulate what you need and want.
And number seven is they love you because you won’t challenge their needs and wants. Now, it always comes down to the question of sexual intimacy, doesn’t it somewhere, it will always get into that conversation. Because they make demands as though what they need and want should be your operating process. That if they want sex or if they want food or if they want to move or if they want the car keys, or if they smash your phone. It’s alright, because you won’t challenge their needs. And once you may even come to a place where you think, Oh, well, you know, they really need that. And if I give it to them, they will at least keep the piece but they may like me more. They won’t. I guarantee it they won’t. Because the whole game is to keep you downtrodden to keep you less than But you may have that thought and if you do, please take it from me, they won’t like you any better for becoming their doormat, they truly won’t.
Because they don’t like you all that much anyway, they like what you give them. They like the attention, they like the validation, they like the servitude, they like that you will do what they ask. But they don’t even know you as a human being. And they’re asking you to stop knowing yourself and defer to their wants and needs. So they like it when you don’t challenge their wants and needs.
Then number eight, another thing they like, they like it when you feel guilty. When you get angry. There’s so how you’re supposed to recognize you’re not even allowed to get angry. You’re not even allowed to have your feelings, you’re not allow you to get to that place where you have these emotions, this arousal, this anger, they will not stand for that. So they like it when you feel guilty if you got a little bit angry, and you start apologizing for it. And where are you supposed to get angry? Where are you supposed to allow yourself to be angry, anger is healthy. It’s how you express it that may be unhealthy. But anger is healthy. It says no, I don’t like that. Or no, you’ve crossed a boundary, or no, you’ve gone too far. And you feel it, you feel it in arousal in your body, that’s helpful. It tells you something about what’s going on. Now learning to express anger is a whole different matter. And when you’re with a Hijackal, they’re not too impressed if you happen to get angry and in their face. And they love that, you know, I did an episode on reactive abuse. And that’s important to understand reactive abuse if you’re with a Hijackal. Because a Hijackal will poke you and prod you and, and Nicolet you and nag at you and poke fun at you and do things in to get a response. And when you finally respond, maybe you’re very angry, and you say things and do things and you’re loud. And then what do they do, they say Oh, you are emotionally abusive. And that’s because they provoked prodded the, their reaction in you, they wanted to get it they went on a long time to get you really upset. And then when you get really upset, then they tell you, you’re abusing them. Now I did a whole episode on reactive abuse, very important to understand recognize when it’s happening. And if it’s become a pattern in your life, you don’t want that one to be. But also you don’t want to be in this situation where the Hijackal loves you. Because if you get angry, you feel guilty, like you don’t have a right to breathe or have a boundary or have any opportunity to have any quality in the relationship. You’re never gonna have a quality in a relationship with a Hijackal Anyway, except for a hot minute, when they think they’re going to lose you or they want something.
So it becomes important number eight that you feel guilty when you get angry. And if you do, they got you just when they want you.
Now the ninth way that you may get stuck in emotional abuse is that you may have been in situations when you were younger, and maybe in this relationship where you have dissociated from your feelings. So you don’t express them. You don’t even know what you’re feeling. It’s all a fog. You know, Susan forward wrote a book about fog. And it’s an acronym for fear, obligation and guilt. She also wrote a book called Emotional blackmail, she talks about it in there too, then you may be in that fog of fear, obligation and guilt. They may have worn you down so much that you don’t know what you think anymore. You don’t know what you feel anymore. So you don’t express it. You have just become dissociated from your feelings. Nobody’s interested in them in your house. So you just don’t even demonstrate an interest in them. You become a zombie. You’re just going through the motions, doing what you can to please and trying to fend off abuse. And that’s a place that you can get out of. It takes work and it takes insurance but you can. And again, as I said earlier, if anybody finds themselves wanting to talk to me, you can go to be our client.com be a client and take advantage of my new client one time opportunity. They’re an hour with me for only $97 Or if you don’t want to do that you can become a member of my emerging empowered immunity, that’s a membership site at join in today.com, there’s help for you. Come on along, join in today.com.
So, we’ve got nine ways now, that will keep you stuck in emotional abuse.
Number 10, is that you start to suppress your emotions. And in the suppression of them, you find them bouncing out, like maybe you tell somebody at a bus station, and you have all the emotions over there to a stranger. Or you start over just closing to the the checkout person in the grocery store, or the classic one, you’re telling your life story to a person on a plane, they have to come out somewhere. And if you notice that you are suppressing your emotions, in the relationship where you ought to have that ability to share with your supposed partner. Hijackals are never partners, but you’re supposed partner, it has to come out somewhere. So you find yourself inappropriately disclosing to strangers or acquaintances, and over burdening your friends. Notice that because the Hijackals is great, I’m not being bothered by that. But then you have to find a way to do it. And it’s a symptom.
So notice that one and number 11, is you apologize for things that are not your fault. You’ve gotten into the habit of apologizing all the time, for things that are not your fault. So maybe you choose a restaurant, and then the person the Hijackal is, is Oh, the food was terrible. The service was terrible. Why did you bring me to this dump. And you find yourself apologizing for the fact that they did not have a good experience. It’s not your fault. You suggested a restaurant that you thought would please it didn’t please, but it’s not your fault. You can you can say to them, Well, I’m you know, I’m sorry, that, that you didn’t enjoy the restaurant, I particularly like that one. And that would be an equal statement. But you may find yourself apologizing for things you didn’t even do. And that are not your fault, in order to keep the peace. And a Hijackal Loves that…
Now number 12.
Is you feel an act invisible and sad that people never get to know you. You just withdraw and you pull back. Because you’re used to in the Hijackal relationship not wanting to be seen not wanting to be called out not wanting to displease then so you have this invisibility and you can actually get into a depression.
As a result of this. You’ve given up, you’ve given up that Joie de Vive, you’ve given up that sense of your right to take up space in the world and draw breath, and you withdraw and you withdraw and your voice is silenced. And Hijackals love that they’ll make you wrong for it, they’ll laugh at you, they’ll they’ll put you down for it.
But in essence, they like it because you are not a barrier to them doing and having and being how they want. And so if you don’t fix these things that I’m talking about, or get some help to fix those things, then you will get stuck in that emotional abuse cycle. And you don’t want that, I certainly don’t want it for you.
And I’m here to help you give you a hand to step out of that. To know that there are ways.
So I’m going to give you eight ways that you can begin to change those fawning responses.
Number one is to just do a little bit of your own work, sit down and reflect on your values. What’s important to you in life? What do you not want to live without in terms of the way people treat each other? Or the things that you value? Not objects? But do you value family? Do you value respect? Do you value integrity? Do you value fairness. And you’re hoping that you’re going to see that in this relationship? And you’re not. So if you go and reflect on your values, then you can calibrate what’s important to you. And you can have a sense of his spot happening here in the relationship with Hijackal. Right? You start to to realize, I really value this, but I’m not receiving it. It’s not available here. We don’t have a shared value which you seldom will with the Hijackal. So when you hear me talking about finding response, you will have come by it organically, either early in life or in this relationship. Don’t make yourself wrong for it. You have to I don’t know what it is to keep yourself safe in most situations. But now that you’re hearing about it, you want to take up the space that you actually occupy. And the first thing is to reflect on your values, and calibrate out what is important to me. And that will stimulate your thinking, it’s important to me and yet I can’t have it here.
The second what to do is to realize that finding is a common default of yours, that you actually have fallen into the pattern of finding. And when you recognize the things that I’ve spoken of tonight, as things that you have fallen into, and you have become someone who tries to keep yourself safe and avoid conflict by finding, recognize that in yourself, don’t beat yourself up for it, as I said, you got there organically, and say, Hmm, now I see how life is going here. And that I am complicit in doing this. And I need to learn some strategies to turn that around. And again, small, incremental strategies. Just small improvements, no big wholesale things, unless there’s physical abuse, or sexual abuse, and if there is, report it, and charge the person, and don’t back down from charging them, because that happens way too frequently.
And I know it’s hard sometimes to go through with it. And I understand that completely.
Alright, number three, what you can do is get clear why you no longer want to be in this situation of fighting. And you might need some help to do that. And as I said, you can go to be a client.com, or join in today.com. If you want my help in the group or the individual session, the private sessions, but get a clear why. Why do I do this? Where did I learn this? How to serve me? How did I develop it? Do I want to continue doing it? Get very, very clear. And you probably need help, as I said, Without because you’ve been living within your own mind and body for such a long time that having someone to ask you the right questions can help you clarify that.
Now what to do number four, is to work through the traumas that created the fawning response in the first place. To be able to recognize that you have had traumas in your life. You know, one person’s trauma is not another. You can have identical twins experience exactly the same thing. One will see it as traumatic and will interrupt life. And the other will take it as a matter of course, every one of us is different. There’s no right way. But one of the things that is the right way is to recognize did I have trauma, and give it a name and realize where it came from? Actually accord yourself the fact that you did have trauma if you did. And it doesn’t have to be something absolutely so horrendous that everybody would say that’s traumatic. It could have been traumatic to you. And it changed. You know, I remember it when I was nine years old. And my I got a report card from school. And the teacher wrote, What happened to that happy go lucky child. Why is this big change in her something to that effect. And of course, my parents said, well, there were no changes. But when I was much older, and I looked back on it, I realized that I had been left with my mother most of the time, they my guard parents who had been always there as a buffer moved away. And I was left with a Hijackal mother who didn’t want children. And at nine, I realized that I’m alone in this. And it was traumatic. It was traumatic, and it may not have been for other people. But for me, it was so recognize that, get a work through on your traumas, identify them. And if you need help, I’m here or find somebody to talk to.
Now, number five, is you need to get away with some perspective on your relationship. You need to get far enough away just even an afternoon where you are just saying what’s really going on in this relationship. I’m so busy feeling it and trying to avoid conflict and all. But if I can step away a little bit, I can see the imbalances and just work on it yourself. Yeah, this doesn’t feel good. Why doesn’t it feel good? What’s going on? And if you notice, that little voice is saying, Well, you could do better You could do better if you just didn’t do this, you’ll find that you’re repeating the things that Hijackal has told you that are negative about yourself. And when you notice that, then you know for sure that you are being traumatized here. And that this is a very unhealthy relationship for you.
The sixth thing that you can do is to listen to the episode that I did on what Healthy Love is, what healthy love is. Because if you’ve never experienced it, or watched other people experiencing Healthy Love, close up enough, you may not know so that you think that the love you’ve experienced is healthy love. And it may not be so go back and listen to the podcast on what healthy love is. Just a little clue, the beginning of my definition of Healthy Love is that you have you make a conscious balance between autonomy and emotional intimacy, that there’s enough balance between where you’re self governing in your life, and where you are relationship based in your life.
So you really have to understand what that healthy balance is. And that’s just one small one portion of it.
So now number seven that you can do is practice, being comfortable with your anger, comfortable with disappointing other people. Because if you have got really hooked into the finding response, you don’t want anyone to be disappointed in you, or anyone to think you’re wrong or anyone to think you’re making waves, you have really shrunken into that. So just practicing. Okay, I don’t like the same thing you do, instead of thinking that will be disappointing to them. Just know that you’re allowed to not share a love of something or an opinion about something, allow you so give yourself permission to realize that, yes, with a Hijackal they may be disappointed that you don’t agree with him all the time. But live with that disappointment and begin to give a little voice to small things that are true for you. To start to create that little wedge that says I’m here I have an opinion, I think I am observing life. And it will allow you to expand, it will allow you to grow into space, take up a little more space, nothing huge, nothing earth shattering no ultimatums at this point, but just a little bit and a little bit.
And the last thing that you can do is to regain your personal power. Now I define personal power this way, that you have the right to choose your thoughts, your words, your actions, and your relationships and your points of view, you absolutely have the right to do that. So start owning the fact that you have that right. That that is what individuated she was human. And if you have been covered over by somebody else’s wants and needs and, and thoughts and actions and you have disappeared in there, we want to start breaking out and saying no, I am a separate individual. I do have differing ideas, and to regain that personal power of recognizing that it’s alright for you to think differently than another human.
It’s alright for you to choose differently than another human. The Hijackal doesn’t like it. But doing that work internally for yourself will allow you to begin to be emerging empowered. That’s why I call my community emerging empowered. Because I want that for every single person that you are emerging empowered in their life. They can do it within the relationship to a degree they can work on it and I work with people long before they ever leave to be emerging empowered. So that when you do decide to leave, you are not a basket case, nothing left, just a doormat, you are actually empowered and you know what you want and you can execute an exit plan.
And so come on over to the emerging empowered community at join in today.com. So many things in this episode, I realized, so you might want to listen to them a couple of times and make some notes. But it’s important to recognize that you learn the fawning response to keep yourself feel safer, and you can regain your sense of self. Once you recognize that you have diminished and feel hopeful begin to be in Emerging empowered, you can do it, nothing earth shattering, tiny bit by tiny bit. And it will be a wonderful change if you find that you are being worn down, torn down and put down by a Hijackal. I’m Dr. Roberta Shaler. And until we speak again, take very good care of yourself. Because you’re precious, and you matter. Talk soon. Thank you for joining me on the save your sanity podcast today. I hope you’ve had some new insights, some ideas and strategies to help you gain clarity and confidence from moving forward toward greater emotional health and safety. You deserve that and so to your children. If you found value here and would like to support this podcast with $1 or five each month, please do so at patreon.com/save your sanity? Learn more about how to work with me by a video conference. Join me optimize circles or subscribe to this podcast on my youtube channel at my website transforming relationship.com Talk soon
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