You can't have both: a partner and a project. When you focus on changing your mate, you've made them into a project. That's a red flag! Whether you're dating or been together awhile, this is a wake-up call. Think about this...honestly!


  • Why relationships don't work when one partner wants to change the other
  • The essential three entities in a relationship
  • Why you lose respect for your partner
  • 3 big problems that trying to fix your partner creates for you
  • 5 damaging thoughts that destroy relationships
  • 6 things that need to happen to make a relationship healthy

You'll never have the partnership you want if you continue to see your partner as a project.

You'll never be loved when your partner wants to fix or change you.


The three essential elements in a healthy relationship all need equal consideration for their well-being: 2 Me's and 1 WE! Too often, those elements are not considered equally. Each "ME" wants the floor, and the "WE" takes a constant back seat. That won't work because it will all be a struggle--a power struggle. That creates tension and stress which produce anxiety. No one does well when those things are prevalent!

Today's topic highlights an underlying issue in relationships in distress: one partner sees their partner as a project.

Remember Episode 115 about the 3 MUST-HAVES For a Healthy Adult Relationship? If not, I invite you listen to that episode. If you did, you'll remember that one MUST-HAVE is equality. That's simply not present when you think you have the right to "fix" your partner.

Your partner cannot be a partner when you are treating them like a project. Take stock now. What's going on in your relationship?

I'm always here to help.


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