He stays up all night so we don’t even share the bed. Is this someone I should try to stick it out with?

q-100We and my live in boyfriend will be together 2 yrs in Feb. I very rarely hear i love you only get a hug and kiss when he’s leaving.  Can’t text him when he works cause the no cell phone policy.  Don’t call his work unless its really important.  We are working opposite shifts and I don’t get to see him often.  When we watch movies he will relax in the recliner and I’m by myself occassionally I will lean over to hold his hand. He stays up all night so we don’t even share the bed. Is this someone I should try to stick it out with? I just don’t feel he’s loves or that he would rather be on the computer or something.

 


 

a-100Hi,

You are wise to ask this question.

For your relationship to have become so comfortably non-involved in only two years tells me one of two things are going on:

  • Your boyfriend is missing his libido.
  • Your boyfriend is missing his interest in the relationship.

If it is the first, then he needs to see a doctor.

If it is the second, you need to talk with a relationship expert to uncover what is really going on. (I work with couples all the time on Skype, so I’m happy to help you if this option is what you choose.  You can even schedule your own appointment HERE. 

Of course, there is a third possibility: confront the issue and ask for the truth. It might take a while to get it, but you really need to get down to bedrock honesty about your life together. It’s not going well.

Have you taken my free online Relationship Checklist? If you haven’t, do it now and learn more about your relationship. TAKE IT HERE.

I wish you well.
Dr. Shaler

January 31, 2015   109    Spouse/Partner  
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