Relationship Help for High-Conflict Situations


High Stress has a High Cost…to yourself, to relationships, to the family, to the workplace.

Are you living or working with a high-conflict person? A chronically difficult person?
You might be if several or all of these are true in your relationship:

  • Trust is questionable.
  • Communication is vague.
  • Conflict management is of no interest to them.
  • Emotional intimacy is nil.
  • You don’t feel safe to talk.
  • You purposely avoid conversations.
  • It’s always your fault, somehow.
  • You’re never right. You cannot win.
  • They assume and presume but never ask.
  • They act on feelings not facts.
  • They are incapable of self-reflection.
  • Fear is their operating system.

Chronically Difficult People at Work

If you are daily dealing with people who fit these high conflict criteria, you are likely dealing with a “Hijackal™*”, maybe even a resulting high conflict environment. How do you recognize them? They:  usually want things their way. want to Read More > >

High Conflict Co-Parenting Strategies

High Conflict co-parenting is stressful.  When your ex is a Hijackal™, you need specific strategies to keep conflict away from the children. Don’t take your divorce out on your kids! High-conflict co-parenting strategies are essential to learn and use to protect Read More > >

How To Cope With Divorce | The Hijackal Trap

High conflict divorces involve at least one high conflict person… That’s a person who loves the sense of battle and is preoccupied with blaming and controlling. These divorces seem to never be final…at least, emotionally.  And, the children often suffer Read More > >

How to Survive in a High-Conflict Family

Did you grow up in a high-conflict family? The effect of a high-conflict person within a family is long-lasting. If you did, you have to learn how to clarify, express and maintain healthy boundaries now.  When you were young, you Read More > >

 Getting the relationship help you need for to manage relationship with a high-conflict person is the wise next step…immediately.

Fortunately, you’re in the right place.  

  • Escaping The Hijackal Trap: ebook to end verbal abuse and emotional abuse

    NEW!! Escaping the Hijackal Trap: Volume 1 – The Truth About Hijackals and Why They Are Crazy-making


Get the insights, skills, strategies, solutions & support you need now. 

 In a hurry?  You can call Dr. Rhoberta Shaler, The Relationship Help Doctor, directly at The Optimize Center in Escondido, CA, for private relationship consultations, classes, seminars, training & keynotes.  760.593.4604. 

You can schedule a one-time free half-hour relationship consultation with her at 

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