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drama in my relationship

You’re Not Me So You Don’t Know What I Think Or Feel.

Difficult people in your life–especially the relentlessly difficult ones I call Hijackals®–like to tell you what you think, what you feel, or what you should think or feel. That’s covert verbal abuse! Did you know that? Where do they get off doing that? Yet, many people are so used to that behavior that they no…

Ssssh! Your Secrets Are Never Safe With A Hijackal

Of course, you want the intimacy that is part of a loving relationship, especially the emotional intimacy of having that one special person who knows you better than almost everyone else. That’s natural. You long for closeness and safety. But, you have a tumultuous relationship with your partner, a relentlessly difficult person, a Hijackal®*. You…

Relationship Help: Are You Living with a High-Conflict Person?

High-conflict people leave you feeling used, abused and usually wrong. You cannot do enough to make them happy, get their approval, or feel you can relax. That takes relationship help. You may well be living or working with a high-conflict person if: you never quite feel you can trust them you always feel as though…

3 Immediate Ways to Empower Yourself When Someone is Angry

When someone is angry–especially when you are faced with an angry, relentlessly difficult person–always remember that the angrier they are, the more brain-dead they are. (Well, not really brain-dead, but when someone is angry, s/he is incapable of thinking straight, that’s for sure.) It’s a simple matter of body chemistry and physiology. The angrier you…

Passive-Aggressive Behavior: Why Do You Tolerate It?

Passive-aggressive behavior is crazy-making. You know–especially if you’ve been reading this blog for a while–that to end passive-aggressive behavior you need to have strong boundaries. So why do you continue to tolerate passive-aggressive behavior? It takes two to be passive-aggressive you know. A person cannot play that game alone!  So, why do you play?  Do…

all your fault what's happening.

If Your Partner Says “It’s All Your Fault,” it’s likely not. Here’s why.

“It’s all your fault!” No matter what is happening you hear “It’s all your fault.” Even, if you weren’t there, it’s somehow all your fault. Maybe, it is. Maybe, you are absolutely incompetent, incapable, and unworthy in every way. But, it’s not likely all your fault. For one thing, you would never have opened this…

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