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Relationship Help: Are You Living with a High-Conflict Person?

High-conflict people leave you feeling used, abused and usually wrong. You cannot do enough to make them happy, get their approval, or feel you can relax. That takes relationship help. You may well be living or working with a high-conflict person if: you never quite feel you can trust them you always feel as though…

3 Immediate Ways to Empower Yourself When Someone is Angry

When someone is angry–especially when you are faced with an angry, relentlessly difficult person–always remember that the angrier they are, the more brain-dead they are. (Well, not really brain-dead, but when someone is angry, s/he is incapable of thinking straight, that’s for sure.) It’s a simple matter of body chemistry and physiology. The angrier you…

Passive-Aggressive Behavior: Why Do You Tolerate It?

Passive-aggressive behavior is crazy-making. You know–especially if you’ve been reading this blog for a while–that to end passive-aggressive behavior you need to have strong boundaries. So why do you continue to tolerate passive-aggressive behavior? It takes two to be passive-aggressive you know. A person cannot play that game alone!  So, why do you play?  Do…

all your fault what's happening.

If Your Partner Says “It’s All Your Fault,” it’s likely not. Here’s why.

“It’s all your fault!” No matter what is happening you hear “It’s all your fault.” Even, if you weren’t there, it’s somehow all your fault. Maybe, it is. Maybe, you are absolutely incompetent, incapable, and unworthy in every way. But, it’s not likely all your fault. For one thing, you would never have opened this…

verbal abuse and emotional abuse when angry

Being Verbally Abused May Be Something You’ve Gone “Nose-Blind” To!

Are you being verbally abused? It’s there. It’s always in the air. It could strike or rebound at any time. Have you gone nose-blind to it? “Nose-blind” is a phrase from a TV ad for air-freshener. The reason you’ve gone “nose-blind” to the awful smells in your house or car is because you have grown…

Keeping Your Cool When Hijackals™ Don’t!

Hijackals®–those relentlessly difficult people in your life–like to think they have power over you. They practice that–in fact, check that–by trying to make you lose your cool. It’s that simple! I’m going to help you with these steps for keeping  your cool around them. Usually, you are on guard for the next irritation when you’re…

How Do You Know If You’re With A Narcissist

Some Hijackals™ have traits that include those of narcissists. I think that too many people use clinical labels for the behaviors of others without knowing what they really mean. To make it easier for non-clinicians to be accurate when describing these behaviors, I created the term “Hijackas” From this panel series I did with Helen…

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