Beware of Introjection & Projection!

You may not know these terms but you know the undercutting feeling one produces, and the scramble the other does! Very important to recognize and say no to! Listen in. Hijackals–people with narcissistic, borderline, passive-aggressive, anti-social traits–play to win. Only to win. They cannot and will not tolerate blame or shame to touch them and […]

How To Keep A Hijackal From Tearing You Down

gaslighting is emotional abuse. "it is intended to make you forget who you are and accept another person's view of your reality"

Hijackals–passive-aggressive. narcissistic. anti-social folks–thrive on tearing you down. Sometimes, it’s a slow picking at you. Sometimes, it’s a constant beratement. Either way, you need to stop it from getting into your head and under your skin. And, if it’s already there, I’ll help you get it out. Listen in. Hijackals–my word for people who hijack […]

How Hijackals Confuse You Through Cognitive Empathy

photo: woman looking confused with head in hands, background of swirling arrows on chalkboard

Yet, it feels real, and you SO want it to be real. There’s where the manipulation and confusion sets in. In this episode, I let you in on the secret that, much as you want it to be real, it isn’t. (Did I mention that?) You need to see that clearly to keep from being […]

RECOGNIZING THE MANIPULATION OF TRIANGULATION

Clearly see how narcissistic people try to control information flow by going through other people, their desired “flying monkeys.” Are there other people in your relationship with the Hijackal who are being approached by the Hijackal to serve their purposes? Do they engage them? Learn how to think about all that! SO important to recognize […]

HIJACKALS ARE BOUNDARY BULLDOZERS

Setting Boundaries. Calibrating Results. Making Decisions. No matter what the Hijackal thinks they are entitled to you need to set, express, and hold boundaries. In this episode, I’ll give you effective ways to begin, or continue, setting clear boundaries and staying strong. Oh, and, what to do when those Hijackals trample them, too! HIGHLIGHTS OF […]

QUELLING THE FEAR OF REJECTION…especially from narcissistic hijackals!

No one likes to be rejected. It’s uncomfortable, painful, and a blow to the self-confidence and self-esteem. What can you do about it? How do you think it through? It’s more difficult in a relationship with a Hijackal, Listen in to understand the dynamics and know what steps to take to quell the fear of rejection. […]

Are You Striving to Be Good Enough for a Narcissist?

If you had a narcissistic or Hijackal parent, you were pre-conditioned to accept the poor treatment of a Hijackal. That’s difficult enough! Then, you may find yourself in a supposedly romantic relationship with one, and eventually it starts to resemble the one with your parents, right? No accident! HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE: Two kinds of […]

ANGER, ANXIETY, HIJACKALS & YOU

A whole chicken and egg thing! Anger and anxiety are closely related, and it’s essential to see how. Hijackals in the mix create a whole other level of mess! Listen in for help to clarify what’s happening IN you and TO you. If you were raised by, live with, or have left a Hijackal–a relentlessly […]

How Not To Settle For Less In Life And Love

If you’re with a relentlessly difficult, toxic person (a #Hijackal), or were raised by one, it’s likely you’ll be feeling somewhat trapped, suffocated, limited, or held back. Let’s start today to change that. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY’S EPISODE: Imagining a full, rich, free life of your choosing. It’s possible! 3 unnecessary ways you might be missing […]

Repeating The Same Fight? It’s Not About What You Think It’s About!

repeating the same fight

Most couples have “that” fight, over and over. It’s the one thing that never gets resolved. The one thing that doesn’t change. One, or both of you, think it should. But nothing changes. Are you repeating the same fight? Know this for sure: the fight is not about what you think it is about!  And, […]